TALKING POINTS AT CLOSE OF SEASON

So a festival of rugby awaits those going to sample the culinary delights of Lyon in a couple of weeks time, with Sarries squaring up against Racing Metro 92 in the European Champions Cup Final on the Saturday evening, and Harlequins facing Montpelier the day before in the Challenge Cup Final. A great blend of French v English, although Montpelier could play in the Super 18, based on the number of Saffers they have in their side. I think, despite Dan Carter, Saracens will have too much for Racing, and Montpelier, going great guns in Top 14, will just pip Quins. I will be there, ensconced in some bouchon somewhere, savouring the finest St Joseph someone else's money can buy.

Can Bristol finally make it back in the Premiership after 17 seasons of disappointment in the Championship (well it feels like it). They have a considerable points advantage over Bedford going into next weekend's semi-final second leg, and, assuming they beat Yorkshire Carnegie at home, should play Doncaster in the final. This will make it a 1st v 2nd in the table clash, and Bristol should win (but as I said, we have been ...etc)

Rob Andrew has finally been fired, and replaced by Nigel Melville, who returns from running USA Rugby on Colorado. Mr Teflon, as he was known, has somehow survived the English rugby debacles of the last 10 years, including the managerial appts of Andy Robinson, Martin Johnson and Stuart Lancaster, plus RWC 2015 early group exit.

And Ruaridh Jackson is having to leave Wasps to find more regular rugby with Harlequins next season, as Danny Cipriani moves South to act as understudy at Wasps to Jimmy Gopperth. Ruaridh was awesome early season and it is a shame that he has to move on. Cips was a Wasps legend first time around, before his injury, but time is against him and I can't see him getting regular starts with Gopperth on form. And Bath have fired their Japanese no.8 Mafi, after a bust up with the physio, so having lost both, Neal Hatley to England, and a tight game v Saints last weekend, not a good end to a bad season for the "money boys".

ONE RULE FOR THE FRENCH, ONE RULE FOR THE REST

In the excellent Guardian Breakdown blog, Paul Rees reported on the contempt that France shows to bans handed out by other bodies like the European Champions Cup Committee. It is truly disgraceful. At the end of January the Stade Français hooker Laurent Sempéré was suspended for 15 weeks after being found guilty of putting a hand near the eye area of the Leicester prop Marcos Ayerza in the European Champions Cup match between the sides. He had been cited for the offence and appeared before an independent disciplinary panel convened by the tournament organisers, along with his team-mate Paul Gabrillagues, who was given eight weeks after admitting making contact with the eye area of Dan Cole. The week before, the Saracens wing Chris Ashton had been suspended for 10 weeks for a similar offence in the Champions Cup match against Ulster and missed the Six Nations having a few days earlier been recalled to the England squad. He completed his ban and returned to action at the beginning of this month. Sempéré, meanwhile, was playing again for Stade within a month of his suspension despite not appealing against it. He profited from French law which, put simply, does not recognise the sanctity of bans laid down outside the country. Its code du sport means they have to be upheld in France to be applied internally. Quelle farce! The full article is here... http://www.theguardian.com/sport/2016/apr/14/france-rules-world-rugby-rfu-laurent-sempere

HOW DO ENGLAND CLASS OF 2016 RATE AGAINST 2003?

As England secure first Six Nations Grand Slam since glory days of 2003, how do today's England starting XV compare to their RWC winning compatriots of 13 years ago? Well, the majority of the 2016 team played in RWC 2015, where England were eliminated at the group stages for the first time, whereas the 2003 team beat all the Southern Hemisphere teams in their own backyard. Consequently they were the no.1 ranked team in the world, whereas today's team are ranked 4th by comparison. If we compare backs of Dawson, Wilknson, Greenwood, Tindall, Robinson, Cohen and Lewsey from 2003 against Care, Ford, Farrell, Joseph, Watson, Nowell and Brown, I personally think only Tuilagi at his best would get into the 2003 side for Tindall at 13 (and his coach thinks he is a 12). Up front compare Woodman, Thompson, Vickery, Johnson, Kay, Hill, Back and Dallaglio from 2003 to Marler, Hartley, Cole, Kruis, Itoje, Robshaw, Haskell and Vunipola. Again, you could make an argument for Itoje for Kay and possibly Vunipola for Dallaglio (or maybe not) but no more than that. The England side of 2003 had leaders and try scorers all over the pitch, whereas today's lineup has a decent back three out wide, a very good goal kicker (but no Jonny), an effective second row, especially in the line out and a bulldozing 8. They lack real leaders especially under pressure and too many have not been in consistently good form recently especially those who play for Bath. I reckon that if the two teams played each other that the 2003 side would win comfortably by two scores.

MARLER ESCAPES PUNISHMENT

Wow not long after Browngate where Mike Brown escaped punishment for kicking Connor Murray in the face, now we have Joe Marler "getting away with it" as James once sang. Even Joe must have thought that he would struggle to survive both a punch on Evans and the gypsy jibe on Samson Lee. But the Six Nations Disciplinary Committee cleared him of all charges so his only sanction is England moving him to the bench, and that is for tactical game plan reasons only. In fact, Eddie " Win at all costs" Jones went on the offensive yesterday claiming Wales were trying to derail his Grand Slam plans when they merely expressed surprise at the surprising decision. If Joe "Teflon" Marler scores the winning try tomorrow to secure the Grand Slam then eyebrows will be raised and bottoms squirmed from World Rugby to the RFU.

PLAYER NEEDS 11 STITCHES IN APPENDAGE INJURY

A rugby league player says his appendage was nearly torn off in a game last month. Haydn Peacock suffered the partial dismemberment while playing for French team AS Carcassonne last month. The intimate injury happened when a player from St Esteve Catalans Dragons grabbed his groin. Haydn needed 11 stitches, which is quite impressive.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/article/35801847/rugby-players-penis-almost-torn-off-in-tackle

Ouch...

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ENGLAND AT U20 LEVEL?

Having discussed the damaging impact of increasing English and French club money on the international game, it is worth a look at the U20 Six Nations table after four weeks. Unlike last year, when England followed up their U20 RWC victory with the Six Nations Championship, Wales sit on top, having won 4 from 4, France are second, having won 3 and lost just one game, Scotland and Ireland are next with 2 wins, 2 losses followed by England and Italy propping up the table with only 1 win and zero wins respectively. England have had a dreadful season, losing to Scotland for the first time at this level, and also conceding 40 points to Wales, the first time they have lost to Wales in England. I am not sure whether you can blame the structure, as it was good enough for a clean sweep last season, or the coaching team, although there are changes afoot. Some blame the fact that despite fewer professional clubs in the Celtic nations, the lack of foreign stars in the Pro 12, allows U20 players to get more game time at a higher level, whereas in England a lot of them get farmed out on loan to Championship clubs like Bedford and Jersey. It maybe that last year's crop were golden, which will benefit England's adult team over the next few years, but, with the system & resources (especially playing numbers) that England have, you don't really expect them to have this problem.

England, jubilant after last year's U20 Six Nations victory

SIX NATIONS REVIEW WEEK 4: ENGLAND WIN WITH WEEK TO SPARE

England won the Six Nations 2016 yesterday, without having to play their last match next Saturday against France. Following their close win on Saturday against Wales, which won them the Triple Crown, and Scotland's impressive victory yesterday against the French, nobody can now overhaul England's current points total of 8. They therefore have just the Grand Slam to go for, a feat they last achieved in 2003.

Shouldn't Dylan be holding the trophy Chris?

England's performance in the first half against Wales was so dominant that they should have been further ahead on the scoreboard than 16-0 at halfway, having has two tries disallowed by the ref. As it was, even with a Wales chargedown try against the run of play early in the second half, the scoreline of 25-7 looked definitive until Wales staged a late comeback, scoring two tries whilst Dan Cole was in the bin. Whilst, the first half was all England, who dominated the Welsh in all areas - scrums, line outs, contact area, etc, the second half belonged to Mr Joubert, making his first appearance on UK soil since, well, you know what. He looked nervous all day and understandably overused the TMO, which didn't allow the game to flow at all. He also failed to manage the scrum properly. I have never seen a scrum wheel so often beyond 360 degrees without penalty (to either side), with the ref just saying "ball out". It was a mess, and England benefited from this free for all in the second half, when Wales started to gain dominance up front, and Cole & Marler disrupted illegally 3-4 times in a row without a card being shown. Cole was eventually binned late on, resulting in the late Wales tries when England only had 14 on the pitch, but he should have gone earlier. The Welsh bench surprisingly had more of an impact than their English counterparts, with Tipuric and Charteris especially effective in the last 15 mins. Many thought that North offloaded before hitting touch after Tuilagi's great tackle on the whistle, and that play should have been allowed to continue, but touch judge raised his flag, so Mr Joubert had no option. There were two class moments, worth the £90 ticket price alone, the first being Itoje's break and pass for Watson's try (he looks a great prospect), and the second, Jonathan Davies' try scoring pass for George North (although his miss pass at the end of the game to put North away again was almost as good).

England deserved the victory and the Championship, with their forwards dominating every other team, and Farrell kicking everything (reminds you of Jonny). They also managed to gain quick ball (unlike in the RWC) and allowed the likes of Watson, Brown and Joseph to show what they are capable of given the ball in space. However, having only beaten Scotland by 6 points, Ireland by 11 points and Wales by 4 points, they still remain work in progress and messrs. Hansen and Cheika will not be quaking in their boots. Only a convincing win in Paris will start to gain the attention of the Southern Hemisphere.